Monday, June 28, 2010

A rant in one part

People weren't always so fat.

It's true!

People didn't spend hours at the gym, either.

They didn't obsess about diets, unless you count obsessing about where your next meal was coming from.

People cooked, and they cooked what they had available, and they weren't giant fat-asses like we are now.

Our food came from animals and plants, not factories and plants.

Cows and pigs and chickens and fruits and vegetables and wheat and corn where turned into something delicious and simple and digestible that fed our bodies what it needed and in turn they removed what they didn't.

Our bodies don't know what to do with chemical preservatives. What is Cool Whip, anyway? I mean, I know what whipping cream is but what is Cool Whip? What is non-dairy whipped topping? I mean, it's a four-word title! Whipped cream is just that, whipped cream.

That's what food should be, exactly what it is. Ground beef should be chunks of beef all ground up. Popcorn should be corn popped. Lemonade should be lemons aided by sugar and water.

Why have we done this to ourselves? Why have we turned sustenance into science? By doing that we've turned the formerly beautiful and marvelous human body into a lump of chemicals, preservatives and fat fat fat!

Why did we think this was better? I mean, the human race survived for thousands of years without sodium phosphate, sodium alginate, and protein concentrate. (We didn't have hand sanitizer or antibiotics either, but that's a different rant.)

What made us so cocky last century? Did we think all of a sudden we could do better? Sure, cars let us drive across a state in a matter of hours, but what's wrong with walking a mile to the grocery store? I've carried three bags of groceries a mile home. Guess what, I'm still alive.

Here's a simple solution: does what you're doing make you feel like a fat ass? Then don't do it. Sitting on a couch all day eating potato chips: does that make you feel good about yourself? Because it makes me feel like a fat ass. Driving the 1.7 miles to work when it's gorgeous, sunny and still outside: makes me feel like a fat ass.

Working little things into your day, like walking or biking instead of driving and spending an extra few seconds looking at labels to make sure you recognize every ingredient in your bread. And enjoying your food, not wolfing it down trying to get as much into your body as possible.

There's a simple solution to our problem. Stop acting like a fat ass and you'll stop being a fat ass.

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