Cleaning up some poop never hurt anyone.

At my new job I have been introduced to the world of fake pets. We sell Webkinz, which has children going crazy. What are Webkinz? They are small stuffed animals that have a code in their tag that unlocks stuff in an online world, making kids sit on their butt all day at the computer with a fake pig in their lap (and we wonder why kids are fat?) I was also introduced to Zoo Zoo Pet (whose name alone enrages me) which are battery operated hamsters, which are just as costly, if not more, than actual hamsters, the only difference is they don't poo or die. Okay, they die, but they can be brought back to life with new batteries.

Seriously parents, get your kid a real pet, a little poo never hurt anyone. There are millions of cats and dogs and other animals sitting in shelters waiting for someone to adopt them and give them a good home, and you're wasting your money on fake pets that in the end pollute the earth? Really? What happens to a Webkinz or a Zoo Zoo Pet when your kid outgrows it? It might get donated to the Salvation Army, but you'll probably just toss it. Kids don't really outgrow pets, in fact, they grow with them. I get just as much joy playing with my cats or my parents' dog as I did 15 years ago.

So the next time your kid is going crazy for some shitty fake pet, either remind them of the real pet they have at home, or consider adopting a pet from your local shelter, or even just volunteer at your local shelter for the time being. But exposure to pets is good for kids, so please help a real pet before buying a fake one.

And cleaning up poo really isn't that bad, a little icky, but you changed diapers, right?